gary.

i can now say that i have been to the coolest place in the world; gary, indiana. 

but seriously, it was so fucking weird, ive never seen so many abandoned buildings in my life in such a small area. 

bloomington, illinois was insane, we went to a dance party where there was an 8yr old singing and her dad was "spinning" or whatever. the poor little girl looked frightened as fuck.

the usa.

is basically like a rotting corpse thats been fucked in so many horrible ways.

gatorade.

london = too many beer bongs.

whippet lounge was lame. dredwig is a fucking asshole. refused to pay any of the bands but jamie fought the good fight and got some money for the bands. the girl who was apparently doing the show had drawn on eyebrows. what a fucking jugallette freak.

last night we played at fanshawe college in london. so much free food and beer. it was insane. they just straight up gave us a bottle of jager. we played, people liked, we sold a shit load of stuff, me and mitch hung out and chanted, he showed pictures of his cats to girls, jamie pressured kids into buying stuff. we got so ripped, it ruled. mitch wanted to get ice cream at a burger king and while we were ordering, we just blasted rammer into the speaker.

today, i am a mess.

signatures.

i found out some other random details about my evening in toronto. i love pizza but i brought it to a completely new level. in this pizza place near where we were, i was waiting in line to get a slice. well i didnt feel like waiting so i decided to jam my fingers in the display case to try and reach the pizz. well that didnt work at the display case was starting to fall on me. marc had to come in and take the thing off of me, which led me to start shaking my fingers and yelling "OWWWW." the funny thing is is that we had half a pizza that was given to us in the van. at one point marc mentioned it to me and my reply was "would you shut the fuck up about that pizza marc! theres shrooms on that pizza." obviously there wasnt any shrooms on it let alone normal mushrooms.

mississauga was really fun. we played at a small bar called marcello's. the show was free so lots of people showed up. we got some free beer and free food, which was awesome. the owner of the bar, who's name was marcello, bought me a scoth after i told him that i was of scotish decent. he then told me that i was a real good fucking kid. he made us sign one of our cd's so he could put it up on his wall of fame. there also this other girl who bought a cd and wanted us to sign it. doing shit like that is actually really embarrassing . she then proceeded to ask us if we jack off into socks. it was a bit bizarre.

woodstock was yet another shit show. never have i been given so much free beer. the show was cool, lots of young kids but they stayed and listened. some little guy bought a shirt and asked if jamie could sign it. after the show we went to a restaurant called crabby joe's, where on monday nights they have these things called "schooners". its basically like buying a 40 at a bar. dan, the dude who put on the show, bought us a bunch and the his friend bought a couple more. we ate about a million salty peanuts and at the table next to us, there was a birthday party going on. the waitress brought out a little cake and everyone sang happy birthday. us being ther shitheads we are started throwing peanut shells all over the place. the place closed at one, so we went to charlie's across the street. on monday nights they have karaoke. all hell broke loose. more beers were bought, and the first song got called. jamie sang ace of spades by motorhead and marc and dave from vatican chainsaw massacre "rocked out" in front of him. the locals seemed to be a little taken aback. then this girl that was a friend of dan's started spitting beer on people. she spat beer right in marc's face, who then twisted it out of his beard into a glass and gave it to dave, who actually drank it. she then proceeded to spit beer into the mouth of dave about 4 or 5 times in a row. jamie then sang dragula by rob zombie. the "sexy" MC was pretty into it all. to finish off the night, jamie sang in da club bu 50 cent. we were all dancing on the dance floor having a blast when a girl who was with us burst onto the floor with no pants on. the floor cleared out in a hurry. it was basically the craziest monday night of my life.

last night we played in kitchener. it was a house show and it was a pretty good turnout. one of the dudes at the house made us some really good soup. i leanred about the term "freegan", which probably has to be one of the dumbest things ive ever heard of. basically, you can eat whatever you want as long as it comes out of a dumpster. i dont even know why you would give a label to that. anyways, the soup was good.

barrie show with the bats got cancelled, so we came to CJ's and are probably going to go see bruce and the dudes in attack in black record today and then go to the falls tonight.

we all still wish colin was here.

wayne gretzky.

brantford = push mosh fest. the show was cool, saw some funny shit, met some weirdo people, especially the girl wearing platform pleather sandals that she probably picked up at hart. the rest of her get-up was no better. she was chubby and shouldve not been wearing the pleather mini skirt/belly top/tube top combo she had going on. she told us that she had lost 3 or 4 cell phones this summer and that she was just going to get a land line because theres no way you can lose one of those. all in all, brantford was pretty funny.

now, ive been to toronto a bunch of times and every time i manage to get pretty rowdy, but nothing compared to last night. the show was fun, we had another hot dog cook out and drank some beers at the venue. the show was good, there was a decent turnout. after that, we collectively took our lives in our hands and drove up to college and bathurst to see if against me was actually going to play at sneaky dee's. they didnt so we went to some other bar, which i didnt even realize was different, i still thought we were at sneaky's. sarah lutz and CJ slam 5 pitchers down on the table. we were all already drunk enough. shit got out of hand, beer was spilled. on the walk back to the house we were set to sleep at, i decided to run as fast as i could down the street. as many of you know, when im out of my mind i tend to run in the direction of either pizza, more beer, or somewhere to sleep. this morning i woke up in an audi using a leather jacket as a blanket. i have no clue how i ended up there, i had all my id's, there was no blood in my underwear, no signs of anything bad. it was really fucking weird. the others were considering calling the police to see if i was picked up and put in the drunk tank for the night. in the morning after trying to figure where the hell i was, i went back to the van and as i was walking by sneaky's, jamie came out and yelled my name. my weird as hell journey was over.

we went to the baseball game today, that was cool. i wanted to kill the fucking kid who was sitting behind me. we went to a vegetarian food festival and i ate a really crappy cookie.

im not living right now, simply existing.

dale.

after much debate, the new van's name is dale. the thing that sealed the deal was when we got the tire changed in halifax, the dude who did was named dale. so there you have it.

funniest tour moment so far: our e3vening in halifax.

a close second goes to marc asking for mais-souffle in french in possibly the most english accent ever.

and an honourable mention goes to the weird/goth/nu-metal girl who asked me where i got my tragedy shirt.

montreal tonight, should be awesome.

the crystal palace.

we played in moncton last night. no one showed up but we met the dudes in hardcharger, they were really really nice. we grilled up some hot dogs in a parking lot. drove back after the "show" and saw one dead deer and one living one. the highway we were driving down was seriously the darkest ive ever been on. tonight we played in fredericton and it was pretty cool. we played in hardcharger's basement. jamie drank this cinnamon rhum and got pretty drunk. people in the maritimes are super nice, although i cant wait to get back to quebec where beer is cheap. tomorrow we're in quebec city.

tour song so far; "homecoming" by the teenagers.

ill see some of you in montreal on thursday.

kissing the cod.

first weekend of tour is coming to an end. the maritimes have been awesome. the van is excellent on gas. the truro show was full of people, we played in the basement of a park building. went to a weird party after the show. in the morning the kids dad came into the living room and said "I WANT MY HOUSE BACK." he then proceeded to walk around and scowl, then came up to our van with an acoustic guitar and a bong and asked us if they were ours. 

halifax was hilarious. we played an awesome house show in a very small basement. jamie had to stand sideways with his head between the ceiling beams. we then went to gus' pub  for thrashfest 08. on a side note, beer here is fucking expensive. so we have not really been partying all that much. we went to the show not thinking we were going to get any beer or anything. we show up to the show and its a filled with metal freaks and other odd characters. a dude in a black leather cloak and staff directed us to our parking spot. we played, went over surprisingly well. people went apeshit for us, people were flying into the monitors and as jamie put it, they were "washing up on the stage". during al of this, our new friend mark black, who booked the house show, was buying us beer after beer. marc's old friend from thunder bay was there too and she was doing the same thing. we all got ridiculously drunk and caused mayhem. marc was throwing his beer bottles everywhere and demanded a free pitcher, which we actually got, jamie climbed on top of the ATM which i was having a "moment" adam was chatting up the weirdest people, including a 40 year old clairvoyant named carol. i passed out in the van, which is very comfortable to sleep in.

charlottetown was yesterday. the show was cool. lots of people. adam had some gear issues. we said goodbye to come clean and the wishlist. went back to he house that we were supposed to play at with lords. the dudes here are hilarous. i watched them play the new grand theft auto and their commentary was really funny. people out here are so friendly. the dude whos house it is let us eat all of his food.  his dog also lied on top of my for awhile, and it was big and also had the flopiest vagina and way too many huge nipples. 

next is moncton, then we head back to quebec. everyone should come to the show in mtl at the lbh. dont use the lame excuse that its too far, just come and hang out. 

i will start posting pictures soon.